Stillness is the move

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 19:59:52 +1100

Mum ran away last night.

I was told to pick up the phone and my aunt asked me if I knew mum's number. I had to call her.

Of course, she didn't pick up.

I slept at one and woke up at three to brush my teeth. When I was done, I groggily turned to gaze at the living room and saw her sitting there. I went to bed.

Every role is stamped with a set of responsibilities, mine is to call emotional parents that decide to not show up at home. Mum's was to prevent that from actually ever happening.

Which is why on the train today I remember a new/old line, life is a series of letdowns.

I do not like having nothing to do on the train, no novel, no DS, no MX Sudoku. It leaves room for contemplation which we all consciously try to avoid in the first place.

Home as well, now I can only read Crime & Punishment.

To do :
- Buy that average backpack.

- Buy that average blazer.

- Go to China to find a nice > average backpack.
- Buy buttons to improve that blazer.

Llama do you purr?
Ciao llama

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Whip it, whip it real good!

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 22:47:17 +1100

Why do firemen wear shirts on the job, doesn't it get warm?

In asking that, I realise my intentions aren't entirely honourable. PHOOWICHU.

Llama it stings!

Ciao llama

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meirkyou

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 15:49:23 +1100

Yesterday Jasmine's friend called me Edwina, sure that's my name but who actually says that.

Fact learnt about myself: I feel uncomfortable when someone calls me by my full name. Edwina is not cool for school.

----

Yesterday we went to Taronga Zoo.

- Luk Chai & Porntip
- Buying Mufasa the monkey

- Amazing brownies

Not much else was memorable, aside from gelatto but even that gelatto was a bit average.

----

Yesterday was also Animal Collective's gig @ Enmore. It was pretty awesome, sure I couldn't remember half of the song names but it was such a trippy blast. And the guy in front of us was such a groover. HA HA (Note to future self: he wasn't, more a tasteless jiver)

Before that we went to dinner at Abstino's and we headed off to a hipster gallery viewing. It was so odd, but the artworks were interesting and the people more so. Oh man at the centre of the room was this giant lighted box and I thought everyone was playing some hipster board game but turns out it was a way to DJ, cos a guy would place blocks on the lighted box which would receive it's individual pattern and signal it to the computer and create a latter jazzy atmosphere.

Oh and I had my first cup of red wine, it's kind of strange. Gave most of mine to this lovely girl called Sharon who needed to get drunk haha. I love drunks, this one was lovable because she was a sparkling vivacious drunk. The drunks I like, I tend to try take care of which I tried that night :)

Haha there was free beer. Naturally I dislike beer but after enough bored sips, it tastes a lot like mineral water.

After the gig, Newtown was littered with hipsters. Haha theyre all so beautiful. At the gig there was this guy that looked like Berto You Lee, mmmMM.

Anyways enough worshipping of the vain I'm going to go back to reading C&P and hopefully not fall asleep as I always do.

Llama, you don't need to be hip,
Ciao llama!

I have a best friend who I'm beginning to think I need a break from, the timing is convenient because I'm leaving the country in 3-4 weeks.

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Hang on

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 23:39:49 +1100

Guy1: Edwina can I cheek you?
E: Wut?
G1: When we press our cheeks against each other?
E: Oh, no.

G2: Edwina we don't speak much
E: No, we don't.
Silence ensues.

Yes I do realise I'm either a cold ice amazon warrior princess, that or I'm great at alienating myself. Correct answer would be both.

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The Belated Hallo Party

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 13:40:37 +1100

i.e. The best Nabs & I ever had (haha)

After work I was basically a storming trooper all the way through until I got home. I went into Liquorland, wasn't too sure what exactly I was supposed to be getting so I got two packs of Cruisers , squee.

Haha had to manage the house alone at some point because Nips and Nabs insisted on going on liquor runs, during the party.

There wasn't any dancing, but the entire night we did watch GO which played a movie feat. Mandy Moore and Jim Halbert -mops up the puddle of drool left over of Halbert afterthought-

Got a little drunk, realised I had a 6am shift, so proceeded to drink strange Berocca concoctions and a lot of water.

Verbatim:

"But drinking water makes me sick!" Edwina.

Oh my.

Went to bed at 12am.

Lol Bonnie had her emotional drunken outbursts as usual, Nips had a cry over the outbursts. And Nabs and Gabbie were mistaken as an item, not surprising since Bonnie is the cling wrap of Drunkenville.

Went to work waking up feeling great, haha. Winnie was a perfect gentleman and drove me to the station.

At work, realised my shift was actually the day after. All in all though, was able to swap days. EXCELLENTE.

Good day, I remembered looking at the party from an omniscient standpoint (in front of the TV) and feeling proud of myself.

Llama wish you were (tangibly) there,
Ciao llama.

Guests included:
- Princess Jasmine (the adults version)
- Harajuku schoolgirl

- Spongebob

- Hippy

- Minnie Mouse

- Wally

- An Incredible

- NewsAnkur

- Tigger

- Charlie Chaplin

- Misty

- Storm

- Lady Gaga

- Snarling Banshee

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Thinking of you is working up an appetite

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 13:27:25 +1100

Update:

- I have a job @ Esprit, good.
- I'm terrified of letting down the people @ Esprit, bad.

- Ani's gotten ideas about me, good.
- This idea being that I like Whiskers, bad.

- I'm earning lots of money, good.
- I don't really have the time to use it, bad.

- It's the holidays, good.
- No one has time to go out with me, bad.

- Edwina, good.
- Edwina, bad.

Llama, you be good, always.

Ciao llama.

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Sky rockets in the night, afternoon delight

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 19:45:46 +1100

WOOEE.

Must do psych readings, will be exam failure if don't.

Ciao llama.

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Good Luck HSCites

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 12:22:03 +1100

Define fail (5 marks)

Fail is a concept broadly used to embody the myriad of characteristics of the homosapien Edwina. Such characteristics underlying such a definition would include forgetting to complete two multiple choice questions in a Macroeconomics exam, or forgetting how a graph looked. Such things elucidate the appropriateness of such a label. Further fail would be some sort of metacognition, such as the process taking place right now which further goes to show realising one's failure can only enhance it. We end this discussion in knowing that continuing any further would only discombobulate the reader.

Well written, concise and accurate. This answer is a model 5-mark response.

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Le stirrer of ze shit

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 21:01:24 +1030

ed receives a call from an unknown caller

e: hello?

X: WHO IS THIS?

e: uh edwina

X: WHO?! YOU CALLED THIS NUMBER.

e: what? .. oh it must've been a wrong number

X: did you call? well fuck off.

e: what?

X: you called this number.

Y in background: Who is it?

X: Some bitch. Here you talk to her

Y: Hello

e: uh hi

Y: Who is this?

e: edwina

Y: what why did you call?

e: Your friend said i called you?

Y: Yeah why'd you call?

e: I'm pretty sure it was a wrong number

Y: where do you live?

e: uhhhh i don't think where i live is relevant

Y: do you live in SOUTH AUSTRALIA?

e: uh no.

Y: yeah tell that to my fiancee.

X is swearing in background.

Y to X: babe she doesn't live in south australia.

Y: i gtg bye.

---- beep beep

e: wtf

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Retirement Plans

nobody@vox.com(edwina) — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 14:12:09 +1030

Nabs and I are always pre-emptive people. We plan before outings and we plan our babies/outfits, now we're planning our golden retirement times.

Should we:
- accumulate lots of moneys

- have no spouse and thus no kids

We shall:
- open up a nice cafe/bookshop/library/non-institutionalised borders with home coffee + brownies and old indie classics jamming on the speakers

- it shall be somewhere deep in the urban jungle or on a nice beachside

Yes it is a smide farfetched, but we have a plan and our plans are usually well thought out.

That is all, llama.

Ciao llama.

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