Well done for taking a two hour break.
My dear Vox, aren't you the haven for disappointment.
I promise in <160 days, you will only blossom with happiness and nothing less ! :)
For now you will only be a convenient outlet for emoism, or the sporadic ecstatic outburst.
Right now the current romantic debacle and its situation =
Edwina asked Ben to the formal --> Ben asks mum --> Bens mum gives him the no due to single mum context --> Ben reassures mum that nothing is going between him and Edwina --> Ben hasn't actually told Edwina any of this because she heard it from a secondary source
Gasp ! :O
Who is this Edwina and Ben?
Lmao, 'til next time.
I am currently in LOVE with the song American Boy by Estelle ft. Kanye West, the song has the most delicious chorus that makes you want to just jump around like a douche.
I am avoiding my responsibility so ungracefully, it's embarassing.
Instead of finishing my essay early and spending the rest of the night on Economics, I took the whole night to write it and I only just finished. Why? Oh I was too busy watching Amadeus :| Good movie, but honestly Edwina, couldn't it have waited for like what 160 days? That's not even ALOT!
For those who don't know the HSC starts in 142 days and add approximately 14 days of exam period you get approximately 160.
Sigh, I'm also distracting myself with the Tenth Circle by Jodi Picoult, some really like her, some really don't. I don't really mind, I just find it suspicious that she's written SO many books. I have to admit though I'm only reading to follow the romance line between the mother and the father who are reconciled by their daughter's misfortune : P
There's a point in time when life is nice.
Well worded more accurately, tolerable, which is a stretch from nice. Still, aside from the small love blemish or so, I feel pretty happy but also really sleepy.
I fell asleep during Extension History, I feel incredibly incredibly bad.
Today I had one of those "parents with a child's computer" experiences i.e. not a great one. Last night I wrote half of my generic Gwen Harwood essay, my gosh it was a push. At midnight I got a little bit tired, so I took a midnight nap. Y'know the kind you take as a break assuming you'd wake up straight afterwards to continue on with your work. Well I woke up at 5:30am, remembering that my teeth had forgotten (well actually I had forgotten) to be brushed. So I did, erasing that "furry feeling in my mouth". Lmao, I came back and to my horror, the laptop was OFF. In the time it took to turn on the laptop, I prepared myself for the possible trauma that I may have lost all my work. My painstaking work. Aha, but it was gone. Instead of acting on my fury and bombing my parents' bed, I kept my cool and stayed focused on the task at hand, there was an essay to write. My mum came out and I legitimately made her feel guilty when I told her that she was the cause of the loss of all my work that I took an entire night to achieve. I felt kind of bad :p Anyways when mum feels bad, it's easier to receive things from her like a ride to school instead of catching the train which consists of walking which I hate.
I legitimately hate walking.
Oh well ! :)
Athletics carnival this Thursday, stay tuned.
Love.
If you've got the song, play "Untouched" by The Veronicas whilst you read this. If not, don't.
Today I went to Discovery, almost late but not quite since our own tutor out-lated us. In us, I was referring to Katrine, Kathy and myself. Katrine today was very withdrawn in a sense where there was a wall. It's kind of sad but it'll go in time considering what has caused the wall.
Today I had my first gyno appointment! Hurray.
The woman didn't touch me ! ( And I sound so disappointed ) When I thought gynaecologist I thought female lying on a bedtop whilst another doctor would inspect their bits. So it was rather underwhelming lmao. Anyways, she suggested some tests and told me that if this irregularity was hereditary then I'd only be able to regulate it through the pill. If not then it was due to stress or what not. Anyways, guess what I'm going to be able to do when that time of the month comes, FAST ! How exciting. When people fast though I usually see some sort of point behind it though like fasting in appreciation, fasting in protest. I'm just fasting so I can get an ultrasound.
I'm getting an ultrasound! I'm sixteen, without child and I'm having an ultrasound XRAY. Wow :D I feel so precocious lmao.
Anyways, I'm also going through a blood test, like wow : D The lady says I seem good with needles since I was so nonchalant when she asked about the cervical cancer shot. Lol I was rather flattered until just a moment ago I recalled my first experience with blood donations. Ha ! Good with needles.
Ehehe, I hope you didn't really put that song on, if you did then, that's cool.
Fingers are cold, spending some more time with Nostradamus.
Edwina xx.
I read a trashy romance novel. A really trashy romance novel. And in reading this trashy romance novel, I was suddenly slapped on the face remembering why I now hated trashy romance novels.
I didn't always hate them, I used to read them with earnest during Year 10, for reasons that I don't know but would probably also contribute to the impression of a school girl with her mind bathing in the sewers.
However reading them, I lost interest and turned my mind to books that weren't splayed with raunchy scenes every alternate page. There was one novel I'll always like from this particular genre but even that one was tastefully done, Belladonna. Job well done. Haha
So yesterday instead of doing some maths tutoring homework, I read get this: Price of Desire. Boy was it trashy.
Thank you for the predictable storyline, thanks for the overused phrases. Thanks for your underdeveloped generic characters (the 'defiant' female & the 'dark' male), thanks for the haphazardly patched ending and thank you for wasting my night.
I just thought I'd explicate that I didn't choose this novel. Yasaswi picked it out as a book I would read, yeah two years ago. Yasaswi forgot to go with the times ha ha.
Okay ladies, goodnight. Stay warm like I'm heating myself up with by reading "Nostradamus and the New Millenium", talk about arousing.
xoxo (I've never exe'd or oh'd my endings before)
By the way, aside from all this. Thank you Katrine, kind of. I know you're probably trying to protect me from the reality of it all, but you should just tell me.
Most women visit their gynaecologist when they're sexually active for their PAP test which would then denote that the women were predominantly in their mid 20s +.
Ah but there's always the speckled anomaly in the crowd, in this particular situation, yours truly at the age of sixteen is the food stain on a white shirt. I'm visiting the vagina expert (well done) tomorrow at noon. What's more I may be getting an ULTRASOUND. Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't ultrasounds usually associated with women who are pregnant.
Rest assured, with hymen intact I don't have a foetus breast-stroking in my stomach. Though Id certainly like one in the future.
Should I be nervous that some strange woman is going to be inspecting my private parts or is this some sort of connotation of my perverse mind.
Oh wells, will record my first gyno appointment tomorrow. :)
Sweet nights !
I slotted my blog into a quiz and it told me that the minimum literacy level required to read my blog is "Junior High". That my friend is slightly disheartening.
On some more news, whilst my internet was capped (oh the drudgery) I bought another book :) The 10th this year to be exact which I wont be able to read until after the HSC.
I also read a book, mind you it was only 115 pages long : | Still it was interesting enough. Memories of my Melancholy Whores, what a title right? It was still pretty okay.
Also, (my gosh, does she not shut up) I sent a long long message to a stranger on the internet today. I don't know why, lmao but it's managed to distract me from sleep for like 20 minutes. Great :)
Thursday = Studying hurrah.
Mixed reactions to my newly trimmed fringe and smashing sideburns ( joke, the sideburns factor is about as real as MJ's nose )
Diana : "Ohhh!"
Amy : "Oh, you cut your hair?"
Sadia : "Did you cut your hair at home by yourself again Ed?"
- Note : Which I never do, something tells me that a pair of scissors in hand with only an inch to separate pincers to eye is something I should not try when I'm bored.
In my honest opinion, I think this trim really accentuates the shape of my face, it's really brought out the PUMPKIN factor of it.
Trust hairdressers to surreptitiously immolate your hair do to their holy hair god and simultaneously dip your confidence into concentrated (like alot of moles concentrated) acid.
Never had a good experience with a hairdresser save for that one occasion I went to the shady Cabramatta region to have shakingly place my hair in the care of an overweight, platinum blonde asian man in his 30s. He looked more like a butcher than a hair artist. Thankfully the abbatoir worker butchered my hair pretty decently, surprisingly enough.
Very hair orientated, very excited.
Why? 'Cos I have an English tutor that's why. LMAO
Can't wait to start telling people I don't mind English like Amy does. .. Well we'll see.
I can't bring myself to blog about anything in particular because nothing is really note-worthy
That suxors.
Edwina
I'm in an emotional rut, it's very sad.
At least it's not over a boy ^____^
It's just school.
I don't really understand what I'm doing wrong in English, I'm averaging a high Band 4 (depressing is it not?).
I try, I really do, everyone keeps feeding me false hope, friends, teachers, mono teachers saying I'll do really well when I show them the work I've prepared but it doesn't work that way at all. It's ironic at times that it's when praise is at it's highest that I get the lowest marks.
Tomorrow I'm calling for an English tutor, I'm praying to God that this will get me out of this rut, I don't mind not getting a Band 6 anymore since that's well and truly out of the question so I'll settle really happily for a Band 5.
Everything else I'm doing fine, except Japanese but Ms Luo says that because I'm getting a Band 4 in class I can expect a Band 5 HSC raw so that's fine too. Lmao, my standards have fallen so low, thank you HSC !
Oh man, I want to cry kind of but this resilience I've built up against English prevents me from letting it give me reason to weep so here I am mentally torn.
I sound so emo, ew :(
Okay so I consulted the UAI Calc and it told me even if I avg'd my high band 4, I'd get 93.05 haha. I hope so, where will 93.05 get me though, I don't really want to rely on the Credits Program for UNSW.
Oh well, ganbare.
